SCENES FROM LIFE: A SHORT PLAYETTE
AT THE HAIRDRESSER: PART 2

SCENE: SMALL HAIR STYLING SALON WITH THREE STYLISTS. FEMALE CLIENT ENTERS SALON


CLIENT
Hi all!

HAIR STYLIST (PEGGY)
You’re early. My 12:30 that was supposed to be here before you is late, but that’s okay. I’ll dye your hair, meanwhile

CLIENT
Cold! I’m frozen. Now I know what a popsicle feels like

PEGGY
You walked here?

CLIENT
Can you tell? I’m wearing a hat, which I absolutely hate, tights under pants, a heavy sweater and a scarf. To top it off, my fingers were so cold and I hadda go buy a cheapie pair of gloves to put inside these old gloves that are finished. My hands feel like the Incredible Hulk. My cheeks burn...

PEGGY
(distracted...looking out of salon front window on to the parking lot)
...what’s going on there?

CLIENT
Oh nothing much. Somebody drove their car into the snow bank. As I was saying, it’s really freezing...

PEGGY
OhmyGawd! I see the car. Wow!

CLIENT
Moving right along... Yup – there are big chunks of the front fender everywhere. Gonna cost big bucks for sure

(PEGGY places plastic cape around client’s shoulders, still staring out of window)

PEGGY
How’d that happen?

CLIENT
Hard to tell. To me, it looks like she was trying to avoid hitting a car that was entering the parking lot and had to swerve...

(a male client enters and sits in chair. STAVROS, men’s stylist, puts cape around him)

MALE CLIENT
Big accident...big...

STAVROS
Uh-huh. Gonna cost a lot to fix that baby

MALE CLIENT
Woman driver of course

(the two men laugh/cackle)

CLIENT
Actually, I saw another car involved and I think it’s a male driver

STAVROS
Yeah but the female probably caused it

(STAVROS and male client laugh)

PEGGY
(straining to see out of the window from her position, standing on tip-toe)
Hey – maybe that’s my customer and that’s why she’s late! Did you get a look at the driver of the car?

CLIENT
Couldn’t miss her. She was pacing back and forth, talking to some people about the accident.

PEGGY
What she look like? Did she have blond streaked hair?

CLIENT
I think so...yeah...she did

PEGGY
I bet that’s her!

CLIENT
Is your client slim? The woman is slim

PEGGY
No...she’s kind’a plump. I’m sure that has’ta be her! Mary – go out and check to see if it’s her!

(MARY, another stylist, is sitting in her chair reading a magazine)

MARY
I’m busy here and besides, it’s too cold

PEGGY
But it could be my customer. It’s gonna screw up all my appointments for tomorrow if it’s her

CLIENT
Yeah Mary – go see if it’s her and if so, tell her she's late and Peggy is waiting for her

PEGGY
Wait a minute – didn’t you say the woman driver was slim?

CLIENT
Uh-huh

PEGGY
Then it’s not her so where is my 12:30?

MALE CLIENT
The driver must’a missed the exit and drove into the snow bank. It’s an older Mercedes and those parts are expensive. Wait ‘til her husband finds out

(MALE CLIENT AND STAVROS LAUGH/CACKLE)

PEGGY
(returns from mixing color in back room. Stares out of window while stirring dye in bowl)
Hmmm...still, maybe my client lost weight and it’s her...

STAVROS
Gonna be tricky to tow the car outta the snow bank.

MALE CLIENT
Yeah but from what I saw, the whole front end of the car is finit-o anyway

PEGGY
Poor lady...

CLIENT
Um...Peggy? We put the dye on my hair, not on my forehead?

PEGGY
Oh...sorry...so busy checking the accident... I mean, what do I say if it’s her? ‘Too bad about your car?’

MARY
I doubt whether she’d keep the appointment, anyway

PEGGY
Probably not under the circumstances. Maybe I should go out and – you know – offer her a coffee or something

MARY
You don’t even know who that is! Anyway, you just wanna know how it happened

PEGGY
Well I would know if you’d go out and check...!

MARY
Alright already! I’ll go but if I catch pneumonia...

(to be continued...)

SCENES FROM REAL LIFE
A SHORT PLAY: "THE LIFT"

SCENE: THE WOMAN BUNDLED UP FOR A COLD, WINTER DAY IS WALKING WITH A SHOPPING BAG SLUNG OVER HER SHOULDER. AS SHE WALKS, SHE STARES DOWN AT THE SNOWY SIDEWALK

CAST: THE WOMAN
WOMAN DRIVER

THE WOMAN
(mumbling to herself)
Cold... Maybe I should turn back. But I need stuff at the supermarket. Should have taken the car but then what is the physical value in that? No - I need exercise and it's really not that cold out. These boots are so damned heavy but at least they're waterproof...and this fur hat is driving me nuts! It's itchy and keeps slipping down to my eyebrows. I probably look like a lunatic. How do I scratch an itch under a fur hat with mittens on? I suppose I could take them off... At least it's fake fur and I don't have to feel guilty about wearing it. I swear I'm gonna take off this hat, throw it on the ground and stamp on it! I better stop talking to myself in case I meet up with someone I know.

(she looks up and notices that a car slows down and stops a few feet in front of her)

THE WOMAN
Uh-oh...who is that? Should I cross the street or keep walking here. I don't want to make it obvious that I'm nervous. Hopefully they won't ask me for directions because I'm really bad at that. The best I end up doing is pointing

(as the point where she is about to pass the car, a window rolls down and the woman driver leans over)

WOMAN DRIVER
Hello there!

THE WOMAN
(moving away from car)
Uh-huh...yes?

WOMAN DRIVER
Are you going to the supermarket?

THE WOMAN
Well...

WOMAN DRIVER
I'm on my way there, myself. Could I offer you a lift?

THE WOMAN
Well...I don't...

WOMAN DRIVER
Don't worry. I often give lifts to women in the winter, especially on a day like today. Cold wind.

WOMAN
Well...okay, I suppose.

(woman gets into car)

WOMAN
(cautiously but anxiously)
Do you...live around... here?

WOMAN DRIVER
I live in the Versailles.

WOMAN
Oh we're neighbors! I live right next door to you! It's very nice that you offer me a lift.

WOMAN DRIVER
It's no problem - I'm on my way there, myself. I probably wouldn't offer a lift to a man, though. You just never know who can get in

WOMAN
Can't tell these days...

WOMAN DRIVER
So...I saw you walking with a shopping bag and I thought 'she's probably going to the supermarket and it's cold outside and the least I can do is offer her a lift.' So here we are!

WOMAN
Yup...

WOMAN DRIVER
Do you have a dog?

WOMAN
Pardon?

WOMAN DRIVER
A dog? You know -woof-woof?

WOMAN
No - just a husband.
(they both laugh)

WOMAN DRIVER
I want to get a dog. Not a big one or anything...I live in an apartment. A dog would be nice and they're good company. I could dress it up in nice clothes like that dog over there

(they both "awwww" at a dog with boots and trendy sweater being walked accross the road)

WOMAN
I had a dog for 15 years. That's enough for me. Too hard to take when they get old and sick

WOMAN DRIVER
Maybe - but I really would like one...

(they turn into supermarket parking lot)

WOMAN
We're here. You are so thoughtful to offer me a lift. You can leave me off here at the pharmacy. I have to get some makeup

WOMAN DRIVER
It's a pleasure. Maybe next time I'll have a dog for you to pet!

WOMAN
Maybe you will! I'm sure we'll see each other again in the Spring living next door to each other. In the winter, we drive in our car and even when we walk, we look down. Bye!

WOMAN DRIVER
Merry Christmas - don't spend all your money!

WOMAN
(watching car drive away)
Nice...really nice! This damned hat is going to drive me nuts...