BARBIE, KEN AND THE REST IN PLASTICVILLE
(The continuing story about life among the plastic people)
BY ELEANOR TYLBOR

SCENE: A WAREHOUSE… SOMEWHERE. ROWS AND ROWS OF BOXES COVER THE FLOOR SPACE. HANGING LIGHT BULBS CAST SHADOWS ON THE WALLS. IT IS THE PLACE OF SOLITUDE AND EXILE FOR BARBIE, KEN, G.I. JOE AND OTHER DOLLS, WHO HAVE HAD TO ADJUST TO LIFE IN A CARDBOARD BOX


BARBIE
(muffled voice)
Hel-lo? Like…can anybody hear me?

G.I. JOE
Yeah – me babe! Your best buddy and boyfriend and love of your life, G.I. Joe, here to save and serve you! Is the enemy near? I can smell the bad guys!

BARBIE
First of all I’m not your girlfriend…why am I bothering when we’ve gone through this a zillion times, already. Like…we are friends. Just friends. Got that? Gee whiz I hate this place!

G.I. JOE
(laughing)
…just friends. Sure babe. I get it! You don’t wanna tell that douche bag, Ken, we’re shacked up. Right?

BARBIE
Say what? How can we be shacked up when we’re living in boxes?

G.I. JOE
Well…see… Uh-oh…I hear something!

BARBIE
(sighing)
You’re always hearing something…

KEN
(sobbing)
Is…that…you…Barbie? I-I’m so scared!

G.I. JOE
Ten-shun! Get a grip, sissy boy! You’re a marine!

BARBIE
Like…G.I. – it’s Ken! Think back! Ken? Surfer dude? The summer house?

G.I. JOE
Ken…Ken… I knew a Ken. Always walked around wearing underwear. A filthy pervert

BARBIE
That’s him. I mean – he’s not a pervert! He’s always prepared for the next big wave

KEN
When are they coming to get us? I’m sure surf’s up!

BARBIE
There are more important things in life than surfing, Ken!

KEN
Oh? Like what?

BARBIE
Well… like getting out of here. I’m so sick of living in a box. Like…my outfit is soooo passé and those Bratz have probably taken my place opening night clubs and everything. Ohhhhhh I’m so depressed!

G.I. JOE
Hey! I can do something ‘bout that with this here hand grenade I just happen to have on me. If I can just…get…at…it… I’ll just pull the string and blow our lids off

BARBIE
Oh fer… You do realize you’ll blow us up, too

G.I. JOE
…if I can just move my arm across here and…almost there…

(lights suddenly go on. There is the muffled sound of voices getting closer)

BARBIE
They’ve come to get us! I knew they’d find us sooner or later! Better fix myself up for the press… Hello? It’s us! Thank goodness you’re here!

VOICE
…yeah. These are them. Been here for a while now… We need the space so we better bring in the big shovels.

BARBIE
What do you mean, ‘big shovels’? You-you can’t do that…

G.I. JOE
…just a little more…I can feel the side of the grenade…the string is right on top…

(WILL THE GANG BE RESCUED FROM THE WAREHOUSE OR WILL THEY FACE A FATAL FATE?)

TO BE CONTINUED…

Writers & Friends

www.jrslater.com/forum

Sometimes things happen for a reason although you may not know or realize it at the time. Only later on do you see some type of plan in the works. Or perhaps fate taking a hand.

As a youngster attending afternoon Hebrew School, it was an activity I dreaded or at least disliked. After a full day of regular classes at school, an hour of having to learn a new language wasn't something I relished. Watching TV was definitely a more interesting option. However, go I did, balking all the way and trying to come up with new and creative excuses to stay home. Most didn't work.

In addition to my mother's determination to ensure that I get some type of Jewish educational background, my teacher who also happened to be the school's principal, did everything in his power to make sure I attended classes. This included the actual physical act of coming to our home to find out the reason for my absence, on occasion unbeknownst to my mother. In restrospect I thought it was a conspiracy between them to prevent me from enjoying life as a kid.

Obviously, the experience left a lasting impression since I wrote and sold a number of short stories based on my experience.

Every year I bring out my favorite story, "The Dreidel King" a.k.a. "The Chanukah King" and post it in the various forums. For me it's a "feel good" story that transcends religion. Another story about how the simplest act of lighting Chanukah candles brought an unexpected response from seniors, comes a close second.

It occurred at this stage of my life that I have the makings of a children's/family play and will use the content of both stories to this end. There are few plays that I'm aware of focusing on Chanukah, especially aimed at children so it's a labor of love.

As I wrote - sometimes things happen for a reason. At least I'd like to believe it.

Shades of "Hair!" and "Oh Calcutta"...

There were calls for the blasphemy laws to be overhauled yesterday after a group of Christian evangelists failed in an attempt to prosecute the Director-General of the BBC, Mark Thompson, for blasphemy over the show Jerry Springer – The Opera.

In a landmark decision, judges at the High Court ruled that the Theatres Act 1968 prevents any prosecution for blasphemy over public performances of plays, and the Broadcasting Act 1990 prevents any prosecution in relation to broadcasts. Human rights lawyers described the decision as “a very important point of law” that would have a widespread impact.

The judges ruled that a district judge had been entitled to find that there was no prime facie case of blasphemy against Jerry Springer – The Opera as it was not aimed at Christianity but was a parody of the chat-show genre.

Lord Justice Hughes and Mr Justice Collins said that the musical “was not and could not reasonably be regarded as aimed at, or an attack on, Christianity or what Christians held sacred”.

The case had been brought by Christian Voice, the evangelical group, which condemned the satirical show as “an offensive, spiteful, systematic mockery and wilful denigration of Christian belief”.

Stephen Green, the national director of Christian Voice, had urged the judges to allow the private prosecution of the Director-General to go ahead for permitting the show to be screened on BBC2 in 2005.

He also wanted to prosecute the show’s producer, Jonathan Thoday.

Mr Green had applied for court orders overturning the refusal of District Judge Caroline Tubbs to issue summonses at the City of Westminster Magistrates’ Court in January. Mr Green’s lawyers argued that the show “clearly crossed the blasphemy threshold”.

Mark Mullins, QC, representing Mr Green and Christian Voice, said the effect of yesterday’s ruling was that “no prosecution for blasphemy can be brought against the BBC”.

He added: “That is tantamount to saying that blasphemy is of little, if any, relevance in today’s society.”

http://entertainment.timesonline.co.uk/tol/arts_and_entertainment/stage/article3007291.ece