Monday, May 30, 2016

OLD SOLDIERS - for Memorial Day

 

OLD SOLDIERS DON'T DIE - THEY  FADE AWAY
 
 
 
In recognition of Memorial Day, the first few pages of "OLD SOLDIERS."
 

OLD SOLDIERS
 
THE TIME:
 THE PRESENT. MORNING.
 
SETTING:
 A PUB/BAR.
 
AT RISE:
SERVICE VETERAN, JOE MCKENNA, SITS AT A TABLE READING A NEWSPAPER, WHILE WAITING FOR HIS BUDDIES TO ARRIVE. A WHITE DOG LAYS ON THE FLOOR BY HIS FEET. BACKGROUND MUSIC SUPPLIED BY AN OLD JUKE BOX
 
JOE
(to himself)

Yup…yup…yup… The way things are goin’, won’t be long before we’re all gone. Poor old, Perce. Died alone without anyone there to see him on his way to the big battlefield in the sky. ‘Here’s to you, Perce! You’ll be missed for sure!’
 
                                    Lifts glass in the air and lowers it
 
‘Refill, Vince.’
JOE’S FRIEND, MIKE, DRESSED IN FULL UNIFORM JOINS HIM AT THE TABLE
 
MIKE
Freezing out there. Wind cuts like a knife. See you got a head start. Buying us a round?
 
JOE
You just got here and already trying to mooch a free drink?
MIKE
When it comes to mooching, bud, you got that covered and then some. When’s the last time you paid?
 
JOE
(pretends to take out imaginary book)
 
Lemme’ check my diary here…last Wednesday, three in the afternoon. You buying or not?
 
MIKE
 
Not. How come you’re not in full dress?
 
JOE
 
What for? I don’t need no uniform to remind myself what we went through
 
MIKE
 
Just don’t seem right, is all
 
JOE

Got it stored away in the back of the cupboard, along with a lot of mothballs. Anyway, the jacket buttons don’t close properly
 
MIKE
 
You reek bad, Joe! Obviously, you tried on the jacket. Smell sticks to your clothes
 
JOE
 
I’ll warn you in advance the next time I try it on. You buying, or what?
 
MIKE
 
Like I told you, not

JOE

You are a cheap bastard! I’m stuck paying, again. ‘Vince – two whiskeys’
 
MIKE
-         Joe here is paying by the way -
 
JOE
-         whatever. See you’re in full regalia.
 
MIKE
If I don’t wear it today, when then? Take it out once a year
 
                                    VINCE, the bartender, brings over drinks
 
VINCE
One of you guys forget to wash?
 
MIKE
 
Joe here uses moth balls to store his uniform
 
JOE
Why should I share it with the moths?
 
VINCE
 
No insult intended but you’re stinking up my bar. Wouldn’t hurt to go and air yourself out a bit. You paying cash, Joe, he asked hopefully
 
JOE
Put it on my tab. Mike here’s as cheap as they come. You’d think for a special occasion he’d spring for a round but noooo….  that would be asking too much for his old friend
 
VINCE
 
Nice if one of you would pay cash for a change. Joe - your tab goes back more than a year. Let’s see here …you owe me $1500.34. I’m feeling generous today so drop the thirty-four cents and make an even $1500
 
JOE
You’re all heart. Where d’ya expect me to find that kind of money on my service pension?
 
VINCE
At least give me something towards it. Anything! I have bills to pay, too, y’know
 
JOE
Next check. I’ll give you a couple of bucks. May have to give up some food items and my dog here will have to get used to eating just a few days a week…
 
VINCE
Why don’t you lay on the guilt a bit more. Listen - about your Daisy… You know I’ve never objected to you bringing her here. She’s a good dog and I like her a lot but as I said, dogs aren’t allowed in bars. I’ve closed my eyes up until now but there’s a new inspector and word has it that he goes by the letter of the law
 
JOE
She’s a service dog. Aren’t you girl?
 
                                    Daisy picks up her head responding to hearing her name
 
She goes where I go. Calms my nerves and watches out for me
 
MIKE
How old is she, anyway? Getting’ on in years
 
JOE
What’s the difference? She’s there when I need her
 
VINCE
She better be legally registered when or if the inspector comes ‘round
 
JOE
Don’t worry ‘bout my Daisy. I’ll just explain there’s extenuating circumstances
 
VINCE
Don’t say I didn’t warn you
 
JOE
Mac’s supposed to meet us here
 
MIKE
Seriously? The man doesn’t drive and uses a walker. How’s he getting here?
 
JOE
He wants to join us for Percy’s funeral
 
MIKE
Amazing. Never lets his condition stop him from doing anything. Sometimes I wonder how he gets around but he manages. Mind over matter I guess. It’s either that or give up and die. Mind you, sometimes when pain takes over, it don’t seem like such a bad idea
 
JOE
He just walked in. Poor guy can hardly move. ‘Over here, Mac!’
 
MIKE
None of us are peppy anymore, in case you hadn’t noticed. My glass is empty by the way
 
JOE
Yeah and? I bought last time
 
MIKE
So what. You owed me from all the rounds I bought before
 
JOE
It’s your turn, el cheapo!
 
MAC
(gasping to catch his breath)
Really…windy… out… there – and cold. Hope the wind… dies…down… for later. Hard to get around in this kind of weather, ‘specially with my walker. What times the funeral, anyway?
 
MIKE
You really planning to attend, Mac? Not trying to discourage you or anything but it’ll be hard pushing your walker on grass and that wind…
 
MAC
I’ll manage. Old Percy was one of the last few members of our group. He deserves our respect and he’d do the same for any of us. Can’t believe he’s gone… Really cold out
 
JOE
You look like an ice cube and your hands are blue. Why didn’t you wear gloves? How’d you get here, anyway?
 
MAC
By bus. Took me forty-five minutes if you don’t count standing at the bus stop waiting for twenty minutes. Damn busses never stick to their schedule
 
MIKE
You shouldn’t even be out in this cold. Didn’t the doctor warn you to stay home in extreme temperatures. This sure qualifies
 
JOE
What’s in the package?
 
MAC
Got a treat for Daisy
 
                                    MAC takes a bone out of a bag
 (cont’d. MAC) Found it in the trash in back of the supermarket on the way here. Look at it – a perfectly good bone with lots of meat. Probably even good enough for us to eat. You should see all the food they toss out there. Fruit and veggies with a couple of bruises and piles of bread. Cakes too!
 
                                    DAISY struggles to get up as MAC gives her the bone
 
MIKE
The dog eats better than we do. You… don’t take things from the trash…do you?
 
MAC
I personally don’t but what if I did? There are people in third world countries that wouldn’t think twice about eating it. ‘There you go Daisy. A perfectly good bone for you. Enjoy. ’Ouch…trouble standing up…back is out again. Stupid bus trip didn’t help none
 
JOE
Why didn’t you take a cab?
 
MAC
You hav’ta be kidding. Like I can afford a taxi? I’m here now so stop jabbering and order me something warm. No – make that hot. Gonna be freezing at the cemetery for sure. Not too many people will show up ‘specially at our age
 
MIKE
There ain’t that many at our age, left. We don’t get to choose the kind of weather t’get buried. Funeral’s called for noon. No uniform?
MAC
Can’t do up the buttons, hands shake that badly. At least I’m wearing my cap
 
 
  

Tuesday, May 24, 2016

Role playing - the characters speak

And so, the playwright, after many (many) re-writes of her play, ponders the next move assisted by the play characters who have a big invested interest in her decision.

SCENE:    Writing desk with computer set-up. Large coffee mug nearby

AT RISE:  Playwright sits in front of computer staring at screen,  evaluating if/and or what changes are required to play


PLAYWRIGHT
I dunno. Somehow, something doesn't feel right... Maybe I should just delete this play altogether

FEMALE CHARACTER 1
Say what? You've been re-working this play for how many years and now you want to erase all traces of us as if we never existed? What did we ever do to you?

PLAYWRIGHT
That's the thing. You haven't done anything to me or for me

FEMALE CHARACTER 1
And that's our fault? Let's not forget who created us in the first place

MALE CHARACTER
May I interject?

FEMALE CHARACTER 1
It's never stopped you before. Go for it

MALE CHARACTER
Seems to me that she hasn't really created a viable outline, which could offer a direction to follow. We all need guidance, a path that will lead us to enlightenment

FEMALE CHARACTER 1
Oh do tell. And what, if anything, have you contributed in helping her along, other than your bon mots and trite writing quotations

MALE CHARACTER
Officially, I don't exist having been eliminated in the last edit but hope springs eternal that I shall be resurrected in a future story line. After all, I am the only male character and the romantic lead

FEMALE CHARACTER 1
Don't be so sure. Given the amount of times the story line has changed, you could just as easily be converted into a female role

MALE CHARACTER
Actually...thinking back...two months ago I assumed the role of Prince

FEMALE CHARACTER
A prince? I don't remember any plot involving royal characters

MALE CHARACTER
Nothing so regal. Prince was a blood hound in her attempt at writing a dinner murder mystery...

PLAYWRIGHT
...which ended up going nowhere. Maybe this just isn't going to work. Maybe...I should forget about this play, altogether.

FEMALE CHARACTER
Don't be so quick to give up!

FEMALE CHARACTER 2
Absolutely! You're on to something! This re-write will be the one. Hang in there

PLAYWRIGHT
It seems that I'm in a constant state of re-writes. Sometimes you have to see the writing on the wall and call it a day

MALE CHARACTER
Have you sent out the latest version of the play to theatres?

PLAYWRIGHT
Yup. Never heard back, as usual. It's getting to the point where I'm questioning whether I have any ability in writing plays. Perhaps it's just hopeful dreaming. Why go on in the face of reality that the odds of my play being produced are probably a gazillion to one, given the number of playwrights who are doing the exact same thing

FEMALE CHARACTER 1
Don't forget that one of your plays did have a reading. That means something

PLAYWRIGHT
But it's still not the same as a full production in a theatre with an audience.

MALE CHARACTER
You're not serious about - you know - that ominous delete button...it was merely a momentary feeling of weakness. Right? You wouldn't do that to us.

FEMALE CHARACTER 1
We're here for you! Hang in there! Our future depends on it, in the true sense of the word

PLAYWRIGHT
Could I abandon you all after all these years, members of my literary family?

MALE CHARACTER
Far be it for me to ask a favor at this point but would you, perhaps, consider re--writing the Prince character? I mean, if it's possible. Barks, growls and tail wagging aren't among my best traits.

PLAYWRIGHT
Thing is...this play really has possibilities. It has all the essential elements that make it entertaining. Maybe a few changes and edits here and there before sending it out to make its way in the theatre world. Right?

ALL PLAY CHARACTERS:
We're with you all the way, girl!

PLAYWRIGHT
Maybe just this one more theatre...or two...three at the most